QotD: Thanks But No Thanks

How do you handle phone calls from telemarketers?

I've worked in telephone customer service, as inbound support only (never telemarketing), so I know a fair bit about the call center industry.  Not that I'd ever condone this, but if you really want to get under the telemarketer's skin:

1. Make them repeat themselves.. often!
2. Talk really, really, REALLY, REALLY slowly.
3. Sound interested, but deranged.  Change the subject, ask questions like "Would you buy this?  Why?  Did your mom buy one?  Is it made in Spain (they make the best 'whatevers')?"
4. Pretend like they've called a secret phone line.  "This is a government phone.  Use of this line by unauthorized persons is a federal offence.  What is your location and badge number?  This call has been traced and police have been dispatched to your location.  Do not attempt to leave or you will be arrested!"
5. Haggle the price.  Barter with chickens or fake stocks.  "Well, I have 100 shares of MacroSquish software that I could sign over to your email address right now."